Robots a Front for the Furtherance of a Racist Agenda?

This past week I went with some friends to see the new Transformers movie and afterwards we sat in the parking lot catching up with each other and discussing the movie. As we talked we looked around the parking lot talking about which cars looked like they could be more than met the eye, that is, robots in disguise. Sitting right next to each other were two nice looking sports cars of similar models. One was yellow and the other was black. I pointed them out as possible robots, and my one friend was quick to point out that while they both could be, the black one would most certainly be an evil decepticon. Joking, I immediately accused her of being blatantly racist against cars of color...darker color that is. We all had a good laugh and left for the night shortly after. I, however, felt that I had hit on something that had more than just a kernel of truth to it.

After much reflection and careful investigation I can only conclude that Michael Bay, in addition to being a horrendous director and a giant tool, is an agent of a secret plot to exacerbate the racial tensions that exist in our society today. You may think that I overreact, but let's look at the facts here people. February 10, 2007 Barack Obama announces his candidacy for President of the United States of America. July 3, 2007 Transformers is released to an enthusiastic audience. January 20, 2009 Barack Obama is sworn in as president of the United States. June 24, 2009 Transformers; Revenge of the Fallen is released to further the message of hate first stated in the first movie. Coincidence? I think not.

Let's look at the African American characters in the first movie. Bernie Mack played a used car dealer who tries to sell a car to the innocent young Sam played by Bay's racist agenda's tool Shia LaBeouf. As the movie progresses Bernie Mack's character is made to look like a fool and his business is ruined, all so as to provide comedy relief for the movie. Bay was obviously using this scene to trivialize the very real economic deprivation of inner city African Americans and to assert the dominance of the white man over African Americans in the financial sector. Bay's depravity does not stop there however.

Let's next look at the autobot Jazz. All cliched jokes about the black guy always dying in movies aside, (Jazz is torn in two later in the movie), Jazz is nothing more than a highly advanced mechanized metal Uncle Tom or Jim Crow. Throughout the entire movie his only function is to spout cliched ebonics which are meant to make him appear more 'black' and to obey the command of Optimus Prime. Optimus Prime by the way is colored most prominently in Red and Blue. Throw some white in there and you have a giant talking American Flag ordering around an insulting racial stereotype. This is obviously meant to be the key point of Michael Bay's racist agenda as he sets up an allegory for the subjugation of the African American people to the United States Government.

I will leave any kind of legal action in the hands of the African American community, but I can only assume that it will soon be coming seeing as Bay, realizing that one movie would not be enough to cram his white supremacist agenda down the throats of freedom loving Americans, has now put out a second movie which continues his depraved and unashamed attack on the African American Community. I pray that America will come to its senses and soon clamor for the downfall of this talentless hack who has only been successful through racist support, large explosions, and the smoking hotness which is Megan Fox.

Freedom Isn't Free, God Bless American, and All Hail the Mighty Robot Overlords!